It can sometimes be difficult to tell if someone is attracted to you because each person behaves so differently. One person might be very bold and just let you know they find you attractive. Another person might try to hide their attraction due to various reasons. And other one might be too shy to really say or do anything.
With all these different types of people how do you know if someone is attracted to you? There are some key signs that help us to identify when someone is attracted to us.
Eye contact
If a person holds eye contact with you for more than a couple seconds, there is a pretty good chance they find you attractive. Typically, if we are not attracted to a person, we will hold eye contact for a second or two, but then it becomes a bit uncomfortable. If this person is willing to look into you eyes for three full seconds or more, there is a good chance they wouldn’t mind getting to know you on a deeper level.
On the flip side, some people completely avoid eye contact with those they like. If you make eye contact and they quickly and shyly turn away that could be another sign that they are attracted to you but they don’t really know what to do about it.
Physical proximity
When we are attracted to someone we don’t mind being close to them. If you notice the person in question gets oddly close to you, not in a creepy way of course, there is a good chance they are attracted to you.
When someone is not attracted to you they will subconsciously move away if you get closer. If you take a step towards them and they take a step back, then they probably feel like you are invading their space. If someone likes you they usually won’t mind sharing their personal space with you, unless they just the type of person who doesn’t like to share their space. But typically, when we are attracted to someone, we will at least let them get closer than other people.
When you are having a conversation with them are they close enough to where you could reach out and touch them easily or is there be bit of distance between you? Do they tend to hug you when they see you? If so, do they tend to draw their body close to yours or is it just a simple back on the back?
Pay attention the next time you are with them, especially if it’s a group setting. Do they find a way to sit near you? When you’re talking to someone else, do they somehow find a way to join your conversation? Do you feel like every time you turn around you see them?
We want to be close to people we are attracted to. If you aren’t sure, try getting close to them and see how they react. If they back away, well then you probably have your answer unless they are just really shy or nervous around you. But if they don’t seem to mind and maybe even reciprocate or get closer to you, then you may have your answer as well.
Physical Touch
Another sign they are attracted to you is do you find little ways to touch you, in an appropriate way. We tend to want to touch the people we are attracted to and we also tend to want them to touch us as well. Physical touch is even considered to be a love language. It can be show in many ways; maybe they give you a hug every time they see you, they might touch your hand while you talk or even playfully punch your arm if you make a joke.
Usually someone who is a bit more confident is more likely to initiate the small touches so just because it doesn’t happen doesn’t mean they aren’t attracted to you. Some people are just a bit too shy to do it. Or, they might “accidentally” touch you so it’s not too obvious. Maybe your hands brush as you both reach for something or they might allow their leg to lean up against yours if you have to sit close to each other.
If someone is not attracted to a person, they will typically move away or maybe even flinch a little bit when someone touches them. It can be a subconscious thing but we don’t feel always feel comfortable with people we don’t like or find attractive getting so close to us. Some people aren’t as bothered by it but others are.
You can always try this out yourself to see how the person in question feels about you. Next time you’re talking, casually touch their arm or shoulder and see how they react. Do they pull away or seem to tense up? Or do they smile and maybe even return the gesture? Also pay attention to if they make any small efforts to touch you while you’re talking to them.
Approaching you
If the person in question tends to walk up and approach you, that is a good sign they are probably attracted to you. They might try to find a creative way to break the ice or make conversation. Maybe they’ll make a joke, ask you a question or give you a compliment.
Most people don’t make a huge effort to seek out those they aren’t really attracted to. Now, there are some people who are just really friendly and make an effort to talk to everyone, so keep that in mind. If you notice that this person goes up and approaches everyone, then it’s harder to tell if they are attracted to you or just being friendly. However, if you notice that they don’t really approach others and you are one of the few they do make an effort to come up to, then that’s a good sign.
Also, take in to consideration how much effort they are putting into approaching you. Did you just happen to cross paths or did they actually go out of their way to the other side of the room to say hi to you specifically?
Remember, shy people tend to have a harder time approaching those they are attracted to, so you might have to make the first move more often if the other person is shy. However, if they are really attracted to you and want to get to know you, they will probably eventually work up the courage to at least say hi. At the very least you’ll probably find your paths crossing oddly often.
Keeping the conversation going
When someone is attracted to you they will typically try to keep a conversation going with you. They will ask you about your day or week, but they won’t stop there. They will ask lots of questions and even introduce new topics to the conversation.
Someone who isn’t attracted to you will usually be polite and say hi or ask how your day is going, but then that is pretty much it. There will typically be a few back and forth basic interactions, followed by a pause and then the conversation will come to a natural end where they will excuse themselves.
People who are attracted to you want to get to know you. They want to learn about the things you like and are interested to hear what you have to say. They will dig deeper into getting to know you and won’t just stay on surface level conversation.
This can be hard to tell because some people are just natural talkers and will talk to everyone. However, generally speaking people do tend to talk more to those they are attracted to or at least feel some kind of connection with. So keep in mind that just because someone is talking to you doesn’t necessarily mean they are attracted to you, but it is a good sign.
Trying to impress you
If someone finds ways to show off to you and impress you, there is a good chance they are attracted to you. Maybe they will offer to carry something heavy to show off their muscles. Maybe they will tell you some random fact to show off their intelligence. They could show you some pictures of food they recently cooked. Or they might just casually mention they got a raise or a promotion.
People want those they like to like them back so if you notice this person trying to impress you there is probably a reason. They are probably trying to prove that they are a good catch and worthy of your interest.
When we aren’t attracted to someone we don’t really care what they think, at least not as much. We don’t feel the need to show off how great we are. And if we aren’t attracted to them we might even subconsciously try to show them the not so good side of us in the hopes that they won’t like us.
But when we are attracted to someone we will typically try to impress them, even if it is subconscious. You might do it and not even realize it and same with them. Listen to things that they throw into the conversation causally. Do they just so happen to tell good things about themselves that you really didn’t need to know or weren’t really relevant to the conversation? Well there’s a chance that they did it to impress you in the hopes to make you like them.
They are always looking at you
If you turn your head towards this person and notice they are looking at you there is a good chance it’s because they are attracted to you. If you catch them looking at you fairly often, then there is a very good chance. People tend to have their eyes wander over to the person or people they find attractive. We just like to look at them many times. Other times we might want to see if they are looking at us.
Some people will be really shy or try to be slick by looking at you and then looking away before you have a chance to make eye contact. They might be trying to hide that they like you or they might just be shy. They might be embarrassed that they got caught and don’t really know what to do next.
Someone who is a bit braver will probably make eye contact and even smile if you catch them while they are checking you out. If this happens and you are attracted to them as well, smile back, that sends a welcoming signal that you are open for conversation.
Of course, if someone is always staring at you it can become too much and feel a bit awkward or even creepy. So make sure if you are looking at the person you’re attracted to that you don’t overdo it. No one wants the person they are attracted to feeling uncomfortable.
They laugh at your jokes
If you make a joke do they tend to always laugh at them? Even the ones that you know aren’t that good? If you notice they tend to laugh at your jokes, especially when you know they aren’t that funny, it is probably because they find you attractive.
Try it. Make a joke when you’re around them and see how they react. If it’s just the two of you there is a chance they are laughing to just be polite or maybe your joke really was funny. The best way to tell is to make the joke in a group setting and see how they react compared to others. If you make the joke and no one but them laughs, it’s probably because they are attracted to you. If everyone laughs, it was probably just a funny joke.
Another interesting way to tell is how do they react when they make jokes. If they tell a joke do they look over to you first to see how you react? Typically when someone is attracted to you, they want to make sure you think whatever they said was funny over the other people in the room. So, if you are in a group of friends and they make a joke, do they turn to you first to see if you are laughing? If they do it’s probably because they are attracted to you. If they don’t or they turn to someone else, they might be attracted to that person.
This can also happen if someone else makes a joke, they might turn to you to share the moment and see if you share the same sense of humor.
We want the person who we like to like us back and we want to know that they are enjoying themselves when we are with them, even if we are doing it subconsciously.
Have you noticed any of these signs?
Still not sure if they are attracted to you? Take one of these quizzes!
Do They Like You as a Friend or More?